You’ve been just a stop for too many people up to this point of your life and you’re tired. That’s fine. You’re allowed to be tired. But you’re not allowed to give him a hard time based on the previous experiences you had.
Of course, that’s the only behavior you know, but you need to push yourself harder. You need to think about how you’re treating him just because you’ve meet too many toxic people in your life. He isn’t the one to be blamed for it. He deserves a proper chance.
He doesn’t deserve the sh*t you put him through. You should’ve learned by now that no matter how curved the ball you throw at him, he’ll always hit it. You’re wasting your time testing him because he plays for the good guys, and he isn’t failing your test.
Your angry outbursts, your indecisions, and unexplainable mood swings won’t push him away. Do you know why? Because he knows you. Because he understands.
He understands what you’ve been through and how hard your past was on you. He knows you have a hard time trusting people because so many of them gave you life lessons where you learned you should never, ever, rely on somebody else but yourself.
The joke is on them because now you have somebody to rely on. You can rely on him.
He knows you can’t be anybody different than you are now and he takes you for what you are. You could only be a worse or a better version of yourself, but he won’t push you either way.
He’ll slowly guide you towards your better side, not because he wants you to change but because he wants you to be the best version of yourself.
He wants all your inner beauty to come to the surface, but he doesn’t want you to be somebody else. You are everything he signed up for.
And he’s one of the rare ones. Because the voices of others can’t cloud his judgment. No matter how many bad things he might hear about you, he’s not judging.
One might guess he’s been in the same dark place you are now, and he knows other people don’t understand. But he gets you. He gets your actions and he always finds a way to see a brighter side of everything.
All for you. He knows you’re worthy. He knows he needs to make you forget all the bad things so you could start fresh with him.
And that’s why he’s constantly trying to create new happy memories, new experiences, and that’s why he’s restless. For you. For the two of you.
He’s not trying to fix you. He’s trying to help you fix yourself. He’s owning a responsibility of making you happy.
Although he has a life aside from you with many people in it, you seem to always come as his priority. He knows you don’t deserve anything less.
Even though you have a hard time believing it, you are. You are the best for him and that’s why he’s not leaving.
He knows he’s not going to find anybody better, but not because you’re narcissistic and you made him believe it, but because he saw your true value.
He saw how strong you are and how you stand firm even at your most vulnerable times. He knows it because he saw it for himself, not because you’ve tricked him.
This is the guy who’s worth letting in. Please, don’t push him away.